18WT 025: We start the
episode with Janet in a parka or so Patrick claims as she has on a long
sweater. He welcomes everyone, because
they’re not just a podcast show for truckers, they are much, much, more. They discuss being crazy before they get
started because well, they are Crae-crae.
please leave your comments and they will be published. To whit Janet throws out that the only ones’
they delete are by Elizabeth because she doesn’t comment or listen. Patrick points out that she did comment on
one episode. They have a shirt moving in
the backround, and the nonsense continues.
Lots of laughs of course.
are talking about stupid criminals that Patrick found on the NY Post
website. Back in April or May of this
year. How stupid do you have to be he
asks, and she replies most people on a scale of one to ten are up there and he
agrees. On that note he wants to start
the party and Janet begins to sing, anyways he brings her out of left field.
Burglar busted with Cheeto dust on
her teeth. Which immediately brings up
the commercial with Ashton Kutcher and his wifey Mila Kunis. Cutie pie Patrick replies caught orange
handed. “Wasn’t me” in both the
commercial and the criminal, Sharon Carr.
Was arrested on first degree burglary charges for committing the
dangerously cheesy act on Friday. At a
home in Tulsa, she was busted after fleeing, after she left a bottle of water
and an open bag of Cheetos on the floor near an open window. Carr emerged from the shadows and the mom
i.d.’ her and the bust was further cemented by the orange snack food residue on
her teeth. So she broke
into a house to have a snack, how high on crack do you have to be, Patrick
asks. Pretty high Janet replies or,
maybe she smoked a little weed and got the munchies.
wants to talk about the stupidest criminal ever she says, this British guy,
Mr. Butler, 36 yr. old, had served 14
years of a 17-year sentence, Broke out
of jail, and had eluded police for months.
Broke out in November and was caught when he went out from his hiding
spot with a friend to go buy a copy of “Call of Duty Black Ops Cold War”. The officer asks them why are you in town
during the pandemic lockdown. Patrick
laughs that the pandemic got him. They
replied that they cannot sit around in lockdown and had to get the new game. The officer
ran the dimwitted duo’s information; Janet says it sounds like a Batman
cartoon. Patrick said he escaped from
jail and was living life on the lam until duty called. You can get a digital copy now. And Janet goes on a rant about it being a
damn game, not real life. Get over
it. But the criminal got confused and
threw kicks and punches at the officer.
So, now instead of his remaining three years, he has five to do.
gets her going about video games, and the sparks fly. She really is trying as he laughs at her. On to the next stupid criminal.
Brainless crooks busted for
kidnapping next to NYPD training center and Janet thinks she knows them. They start laughing. A group of bumbling crooks force a guy into a
car and attempt to kidnap him. This
brings on the entire conversation about how big of a car and how big of a group
to be a group. Was it a smart car full
of clowns, like in a circus; maybe they agree.
A 19 yr. old victim in Bensonhurst was selling his car off of Facebook
at 10pm. He arrived and 6 brutes pushed
him into a vehicle flashing a fake gun.
Janet points out if they flash a fake one, she will flash a real
one. Then they blindfolded him and
called his cousin on his phone demanding $10 thousand for his safe return. But the
smarty britches quick thinking cousin traced the phone and it pinged near Floyd
Bennett Field, an NYPD training facility usually crawling with cops. Here’s your sign stupid Patrick says, and
continues that officers from the 62nd and 67th precincts
along with city parks police rushed to the area and the alleged kidnappers were
arrested. All six dumb asses.
This is the one I asked you about
Janet says. Oh the birdbrain Patrick
replies. Yes, she says.
redefined flying cheap after getting busted Sunday at JFK International Airport
smuggling in 29 live birds concealed inside hair rollers. A hairy experience missed it by a hair, and
the hair jokes roll. He was
caught during a luggage inspection. The
birds were inside the rollers, inside his luggage. He was only fined $300 and both hosts are
surprised by that. Although it sound hilarious,
Janet quotes, U.S. Customs takes bird smuggling very seriously. There is the threat of Avian Flu. If they take
it so seriously, why only $300. They
discuss culling and they loss of animals from it. Last month Indian smugglers attempted to
smuggle gold and stacks of cash under their glued-on wigs. Our hosts pretty much lose it over that. Stacks of cash, and gold, how bad are the
wigs they wonder. And how heavy with
gold on your head. In the infamous words
of Bill Engvall “Here’s your sign”.
removes her sweater as she says, for ten minutes or so she will be warm. It doesn’t happen often but for now it is
good. She then points out that the two
of them kind of match. Patrick
sneezes a hundred times and this brings up an entire conversation about his
family and sneezing.
Banks don’t accept by Cocaine.
24 yr. old from Jefferson county CO. And Janet puts her sweater back on. And the jokes continue. This guy
went to the bank drive thru and used the swishy tubes as Janet calls them
(pneumatic tubes). Puts his money in the
holder, put it in the tube and sent it up.
When the teller opened it up, they didn’t just find money, they found
two bags of cocaine and called the cops. Patrick says
he would have put it in his pocket and sold it on the street. Janet asks when did he become a big drug
dealer? And how did she miss the
message? They could be rolling in the
money. More singing. The guys’
car was searched, and he was arrested.
But for what, intent to sell.
Patrick again says he would have gone to his druggy friends and asked
them the value. Janet said of course you
have druggy friends, she doesn’t, so she would ask him. So he could ask his druggy friends. He now denies having druggy friends and more
laughter as a rewind is requested. It
seems that Janet is correct again. She
doesn’t have druggy friends, she has him! She threw him under the bus and he
dropped the F-Bomb. Over 20 minutes and
Janet asks if Patrick likes Lynyrd
A guy stole $12 thousand in
Lynyrd Skynyrd memorabilia. He stole a
trailer out of a hotel parking lot, and it was filled with donations that were
going to be sold off for a charity cancer event in honor of Jimmy Van
Zandt. The most valuable item in the
trailer was a 1957 Les Paul autographed guitar.
They are both sure it had a lot of things in it that were valuable. Janet
tells about how trailer and U-Hauls’ being stolen is actually quite common.
More stupid crimes were read out loud.
There are two guys in England, that
took photo’s of themselves stealing from slot machines. Benjamin Robinson (any relation to
Christopher they both wonder and laugh) was given 32 months and Daniel
Hutchinson got 6 months suspended.
Another guy put his plans on Facebook
before he did the robbery. It took
police 15 minutes to catch him, he got 4 years.
The goldilocks burglar washed his
pots and his pants in a home. A retired
couple returned from vacation to find a burglar asleep in their bed. He had done their dishes, bought groceries,
cleaned house, and washed his underwear.
He got two years suspended.
Bird brained prank, two Welsh
tourists, stole a penguin named Dirk from Sea World from the gold coast. They swam with the dolphins and put off a
fire extinguisher in the shark tank.
They tried to take care of the penguin by putting him in the shower and
feeding him. They later released him in
a canal but were arrested and fined.
A man didn’t like the photo on his
arrest warrant in Ohio. So he sent the
police a better one. Citing that the
picture they had made him look like James Brown on the run. They thanked him for the better more current
An Afghan Taliban commander turned
himself in at a police checkpoint and pointed to his own wanted poster,
requesting his own arrest reward. The
only statement authorities had to say was “clearly this man is an imbecile”.
tells a joke backwards, as always.
Don’t move, I have a cucumber. A guy tried to rob a bookstore. The cucumber came out of the black sock when
he was tackled by an off-duty police officer.
He tried telling police it was a joke.
Catch me if you can…criminal o the
run took an ill-advised turn in taunting police. Telling police to catch me if you can. They joke about the name of the town for a
bit; but is seems to be pronounced “carefully”.
He even told the local news; I am just walking around by home, and they
will never look for me here. He was
caught the same day.
A hapless holdup, during an attempted
heist, the robber used a toy gun and then couldn’t leave because he was pulling
on the door. The lady he held up had to
come open the door for him by pushing it open.
He also had tried to rob the same shop ten days earlier. He got 3 years for the offense and 2 years
for possession of a toy gun.
Bag man named badman. Mr. Badman used a bag on his head and took
the bag off in front of c.c. tv and looked right at the camera. It cost him 900 pounds and court costs.
A burglar in China got stuck trying
to squeeze through a 5th floor window, he’s no Jackie Chan.
The next guy vaguely resembles a fat,
beat up, hung over Johnny Depp, kinda sorta Janet thinks. He robbed his local bank wearing sunglasses
and socks over his shoes. Gave the
teller his correct name an address. Went
home and to his local bank because he changed his address. They found him without any problems.
people everywhere are stupid.
In South Africa, a man trying to
steal a car got locked inside of it.
People going by took pictures, taunted, and laughed. The owner left him there and called the
The next guy stole a phone without
changing the sim card. Took selfies
which went to all of the friends and co-workers. He was snared by selfies, caught with
everything including the Rolex and all.
begin discussing how not to rob a bank and how Janet maybe could wear
sunglasses and a pink beanie, and nobody would know who she is, maybe.
up with some Breast Cancer Support requests from their listeners, more sales from
the support tab on the website equals more money for research.